Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
