Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
