Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
