i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
