My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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