I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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