I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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