It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
