hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
