I just cut my nipple shaving
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
