New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
