I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
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