You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
