just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Randomize