I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
