I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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