Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize