belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
