How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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