Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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