If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
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