drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
