i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
