In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
it glows. i had to have it.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize