Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
