do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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