just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
