Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
