is your mom at the bar?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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