Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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