Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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