He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I need to sanitize my soul.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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