your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Randomize
