Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize
