You were right. It hurts to walk today.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
