Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
he fucked my hip out of place.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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