Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
