please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
