Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
