I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I smell like Dick and happiness
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
