First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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