k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Randomize
