Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
