she was so not down for the gang bang
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Just invented taco cereal.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
