omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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