Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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