with your own penis?
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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