drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize