He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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