You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
