Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
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